My Own Private Conspiracy Theory

I've been harboring my own private conspiracy theory for a while now, guess I'll drop it here in the semi-open. I haven't seen this one put forth anywhere else, but then most of my news on the Iraq atrocity comes from sources, such as The Nation, that aren't likely to print unfounded, hence irresponsible, statements about the government no matter how much they disagree with the current policy-makers. But I can do it. Here it goes: The Dubyadministration decided it was the right time to attack Iraq, not because they believed Iraq was hiding weapons of mass destruction, but because they knew there were none.

True, the Senate intelligence committee didn't come to this conclusion in their congressional report. But who really believes that the CIA is going to let a congressional inquiry learn anything that the CIA doesn't really want them to know? The CIA has taken a lot of hits for mistakes that clearly should have landed on Dubya's chin. We've had almost three years of pin the tail on George Tenet, even still after his resignation. My scenario actually offers some solace to Americans because it means the CIA is less inept and more, well, let's say "pernicious"—in its archaic sense. Besides, playing the butt that gets kicked isn't all bad for them. As if in a game of Texas Hold ’Em (we know how much certain powers-that-be love card-game metaphors) where you want to project a table image quite different from the way you actually play, the CIA allows themselves to be presented as an incompetent, disorganized organization, when you know they're not that bad off.

There's also the fact that the Dubyadministration contains known, long-standing hawks on Iraq, most notably Donald Rumsfeld, who have been itching to go there for some reason. The whole profile of the situation fits with the Dubyadministration, which constantly tells the people the opposite of what they plan to do. The big example here is the "Clear Skies" Clean Air Act, which has all but dismantled environmental regulations and let a number of large corporations off the hook for long-overdue fines. But there's also the less recognized Dubyadministration push to limit the number of workers who qualify for overtime pay, even as Dubya himself continues to portray himself as the good buddy of America's working class.

Anyway, knowing that casualties would be minimal because there were no WMD, the
Dubyadministration figured on a short, soaringly-popular war. This helps explain Dubya's premature masquerade on the battleship in May 2003—the point's been made by many others, but every time I think about it I'm taken by the idea that it's so long, over a year now, since our President declared "victory" in "the battle of Iraq".